What MOtivates Hate?
Professor of psychology, Mark Alicke explains that, "When people disagree with us, their disagreement not only influences the validity of our beliefs, but it calls into question our personal identities—the kind of people we want to believe that we are." Disagreements make us question not just our ideas and values, but our identities and self-concepts. And we're terrified of losing self. We react with disdain and fight back.
Hate is a response motivated by fear.
As we learned on Sunday from Romans 9:1-5, the truth is meant to foster compassion and humility in us. This should be particularly clear in disagreement. But compassion and humility make us vulnerable ... to pain ... to disappointment ... to mistreatment ... to being misunderstood. You see, when we're afraid that our identity is in jeopardy we won't show compassion and humility.
Hatred and fear create distance.
Compassion and humility draw us near.
The more this happens within us the more we gravitate toward likeminded groups or tribes. And so we defend whole groups of people who have a shared identity ... Christians ... evangelicals ... Republicans ... Democrats ... public school families ... city families ... people who move to the suburbs ... maskers ... anti-vaxers ... and so on. Right? As we defend our groups we rarely remain self-effacing or curiosity about those with whom we disagree. Instead we disdain them. Fear of losing self leads us to hate those whom we categorize as a threat.
Now the issue is not dividing into groups. Community and shared identity can be beautiful. The issue is demonizing the other. Knowing and sharing the truth is good. But it must not be divorced from love. Truth is not fully grown until it blossoms with the foliage of humility and compassion.
In Romans 9 Paul is telling his fellow Jews that they are wrong. In response to their discord and disagreement he could easily have chosen hate and hunkered down with people who act and think like him. After all, plenty of Jewish leaders were trying to kill Paul! Out of fear he could have chosen to create distance. But he doesn't. He speaks to them. He asks questions. He cries for them. He pleads with them. Why? Because that's the gospel: we who disagreed and hated God have experienced his compassion and nearness in the person and work of Jesus Christ.
When the truth and love of the gospel have shaped our identity then we don't have to fight for it every day. We don't have to protect ourselves from those who disagree with us. God is our protection. We don't have to hive off into self-edifying groups. God is our righteousness. In Christ we are freed from fear and hate to show humility and compassion toward those with whom we disagree.
Hate is motivated by fear of losing self. Compassion and humility is rooted in love and our secure identity in Christ.
